A Life in Words

Will I fall, Will I follow or will I fall. Does life ever seem to come down to something as simple as good or bad. Seasons of my life have proven to be strong, seasons of my life have also proven to be weak, but inside of those seasons you cannot assume that the strength will be all seasons long, or the weakness to be an everyday thing. Here I stand hoping that my seasons will remain strong even if the strength has failed a time or two. Extreme changes usually mean extreme.... This is all BS, something happens in your life and you try your hardest to make some poetic attempt to make sense of it all. Some journal, some blog, some pray, and some talk to friends about the moments that are taking their breath away. We sit and wait for some grand entrance of a feeling hoping that even if we screw up the poetic justice at the end of the day will revile itself by justifying why you just did what you did, or how you can become stronger because of the slip you have just made. I screw up in my life, I wont deny it, i screw up knowing that what I am about to do is so screwy that even I should be able to look at it with strenght and say no. Dear God, how was i supposed to know other than the fact that you told me so that I would be tested in ways that I had never before expected. But yet in the end I have always expected which pit I should fall in. This IS STILL BS. GOD, I am sorry, I am sorry for the crap that happens, more importantly I am sorry for the crap that I do, the crap that I know you don't appreciate and I know that I am not honoring you with my life. Here I am, all BS aside. I have fallen and I have failed. Save me now, because the path that you have put me on feels so right. Help me to follow this road... Help me.... Help me