A Life in Words

Tuesday - So this is brand new but I think I can handle it... So today there is so much crap going on in my life that I can barely hold everything down in my head and one more thing is just way to much. I graduate in about 50 days which is a great thing to look forward to but of course my head is thinking of more things than just that. Will I have a job, will I be happy in that job, other jobs that I am currently doing, am I leaving those jobs in good shape, and then you start to think about personal stuff and your life. It is hard trying to sit down and figure out or try to plan what is going to happen tomorrow in your life. But of course the things that I think about are more unsolved mysteries than anything else. I think about God and how much of a horrible friend I am to him. I think about all the crap that is going on that I am doing and that is being done in my life. I think about friends and then start to worry about little things involving them. And if your thinking that my thoughts are centered around more negaitve things I will agree. Because if I start to think about some of the good things, some of the possibilities they just end of falling of and wind up hurting... Maybe I screw them up, maybe they screw me over I dunno... Best to just leave it alone till I either get strong enough to get screwed or smart enough to stop messing things up...